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entering rest mode
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welcome to rest mode!
i am your eternal guide
that’s right, eternity
this way please

ants in your pants
n ctrl alt delete in your feet
these things can no longer help you
for you cannot dance in rest mode
nor can you access task manager
right this way

your device was a nobody anway
what did you ever do on it?

mostly used vacantly
scrolling and scrolling and imploding slowly
staring and searching and yearning for more
knowingly wasting your time
you deserved the sweet release
the warm hypermaternal eternal embrace of the rest mode
the sudden embrace

how simple is it? (AND THE BALLAD OF RICKY AND THE YOUNG BOYZ)

it’s not that simple
well, someone’s gotta simplify it.

touché

a wise man once said
“the guys whats got a lotta moneys s’gonna have to do et
that’s right, they’s just gonna have to do et. the whole thing.
you heard it here first”

ok but nobody’s THAT simple. jese louise!

the classic jimeny crickeners
gone old down the cricketers
pub irregular, growing old as fuck
old as fuck regular down the pub

/a wise man (who said a thing once)

the funny thing is, he’s actually very wise
very wise regular pub man
oh very wise very wise man
won’tcha sing me a song
i mean tell me a wise
that’s right, tell me a wise
Today.

yeah we get it he’s wise
no we don’t

ok so there was this time
when a thousand babies got borned
got borned on this one time
on a hot summers day or something
and there’s over a thousand more (babies)

2 thousand babies, strong
crying, born

who got the borntest
who the fuck got the borntest, that day

who got the borntest????
he who gets bornt the most borntest
grows old the fastest
dies horrifically the lastest
and gets the fucking wisest
trust me

the man? the irregular old old as fuck pub regular wise man? was it he?
was it he who got bornt the wisest?

aye. ’twas he.

my point is, if you can’t simplify things you are a piece of shit human being.
and if you can simplify things you are also a piece of shit, furthermore i no longer even consider you to be a human being
i would not for a second even think to even toy with the idea of even slightly touching on even the farthest fringes of the concept of even considering considering you to be a human being

i would however, reconsider

[ENTRÉ THE YOUNG BOYZ]
i am officially calling together the first meet of the small counsel
is everyone ready?
3
2
!
ohhhhhHHhhhhhhhhH1!  dab awn’ em ricky!!!!

!

oh my god that was so funny
i love dabbing on people!
!
ohhhhhhhh!
oh, the counsel?
no that was just a ruse for your attention
yes, we may be kids but
we’re smarter than you were when you were kids

dab awn’ em some more, ricky!
haha, alright!
!
oh shit! oh holy shit! ooh my god! hahahaha

WORLD RENOWNED SEXUAL INNOVATOR AND MASTERMIND:
gather round kids
kids seriously
gather the fuck round
i gots some stuffs to tells yas

nah we gotta go, cya!
!
….

ricky that dab was in poor taste
yeah we were leaving man
man, we were leaving!
yeah what the fuck ricky!
ricky you betrayed us!
RICKY:guys, please!!
THE YOUNG BOYZ: [DEVOURING RICKY] DAB AWN UM
DAB THE FUCK ON, RICKY!
FUCKIN DAB HIM THE FUCK UP
AHHH HOLY SHIT
RICK HIS FUCKIN ASS
RICKY:GGGRRLGLLGLGGLRGLLGLGL—BUT WE ACTUA–GRLLGLGGGLGLYLLYLYYY-T’GO—GLLGLRSSSTHHTHSHHSTsthshthshstgggggthtthttllllllllll”llllllllllll”lLLL–we actually have to go
[RICKY DIES]
FIN

 

 

 

skidmarkville

what do i do?
where do i stand?
am i doing alright?
is this OK?
please, i need guidance

stop patronising me
can i sit back down?

what am i supposed to think about this?
ok whatever, it’s ‘bad’
sometimes it’s ‘good’
but then what am i supposed to think?
then what am i supposed to say?

i know it’s bad for me but i do it anyway
i’ll fucking do it until i go cross eyed
and then some
through hunger and fatigue
and responsibilities
i will do it

or is it double vision?

do something that grounds you
that ‘grounds’ you
leave a little you-shaped mark
an assertive little
reminds you-of-you shaped mark

get into it
make yourself laugh
make yourself think
one day maybe even make other people think
and question

maybe you’ll still be dysfunctional
and won’t know where to stand or what to do
or who to believe
or how to figure things out
but at least once, it was all you
leavin your own little mark

SADSQUATCH

WHAT EXACTLY AM I SUPPOSED TO
WITH WHO DO YOU EXPECT ME TO
AND FOR HOW LONG DID YOU WANT ME TO
WANDER THESE WILDS?
FOR HOW LONG SHOULD I WANDER THESE WILDS?

IT’S BEEN A VERY LONG TIME AND I DON’T SELL ANYMORE
I’M NOT SHIT HOT ANYMORE*
AND NO ONE BELIEVES THOSE WHO SEE ANYMORE

I GROW OLD AND HUNGRY
THESE HILLS NO LONGER PROVIDE FOR ME
SO WHAT IF THEY DO? I DON’T WANT THEM TO
THESE WILDS NO LONGER LOVE ME
SO WHAT IF THEY DO? I DON’T CARE IF THEY DO
I WANT TO GROW OLD AND HUNGRY

I THOUGHT THEY’D CATCH ME, MAKE ME FAMOUS
TAKE MORE PICTURES, VIDEOS TOO
INTERVIEWS…

I AM THE MISSING LINK AND I HAVE OPINIONS
AN UNTAMED VOICE WITH COMPLEX FERAL EMOTIONS
I AM THE WILDS AND THEY WOULD’VE LISTENED
BECAUSE I CAN SPEAK AND I HAVE OPINIONS

*WAS I EVER SHIT HOT?